I want someone who understands and appreciates this kink enough to know that they are an addition to an already amazing sex life. Being respectful of my marriage and my time goes a long way. I love the back and forth of getting to know someone but there’s a fine line between being interested and being intrusive. Follow the couples lead as far as communication. Ask plenty of questions so you know what they’re looking for and make sure they know what you’re comfortable with.
I want someone who makes me feel safe, comfortable and at ease. Keep in mind that the sex you have will depend largely on how comfortable and trusting we are to ‘let go’ with you.
I want someone who is enthusiastic and makes me feel desired. That’s just common sense and makes sense for any woman you want to sleep with. I think it’s pretty across the board that the husbands enjoy knowing that you desire their wife and that she’s going to have an amazing time with you. Turn her on, keep in touch. Remember that you’re not dating and the rules don’t apply so there’s no need to be coy. Show your enthusiasm before meeting, when you’re in her company and after the fact.
I want someone who can be themselves in and out of bed. I like the variety and exposure to new people and places that hotwifing affords me. I don’t want to fuck a stereotypical ‘bull’ every time. I want to get to know you as a person and go from there. In bed, there’s nothing specific I expect of a bull. Go with the flow or with whatever you’ve discussed with the hw/couple before meeting.
I want a partner who is open minded and non-judgmental.
I want a guy who’s confident…maybe even a little cocky. Not a false macho confidence but be cool with who you are and what you have to offer. I’m fairly sarcastic so I want someone who can roll with it and not be offended easily.
It’s mandatory to be STD free and willing to be open and honest with us about that. All of our safety rules have to be followed and respected. We’re incredibly respectful of other people’s boundaries and needs so we expect the same.
Be great in bed. This is our fantasy and sexual outlet, I aim to please in bed and you should too. Don’t be lazy or selfish.
Behave like an adult. If you’re invited to join a hw or couple and get cold feet be upfront and cancel politely or reschedule. Don’t lead people on and don’t feel the need to make promises or claims you can’t live up to.
For me personally I like a ‘bull’ that I have a connection with who happen to be devastatingly handsome, charming, dominant & rough in bed, interesting and intelligent. Sarcastic, witty and a love of innuendo are on the list too as is sexy, funny, athletic, hung, passionate and kinky are all bonuses.
Also realize that as a guy who shares our fun little fantasy we really like you and want you to have an amazing time. Speak up and let us know what turns you on, what kind of experience you want, etc. It may just be a personal thing but I’m a giver so I want to know that all of your wants are just as fulfilled as mine.