I’m selfishly hoping I’m not the only one here but I’ve had my fair share of hotwife ‘misadventures’ along the way. Figured I’d share some of the various embarrassing moments in hopes that 1. You all have some too and 2. Just to share that we all have our moments and we get through and eventually can have a good laugh at our own expense.
Early on I was going to meet a guy in southern Jersey, so about a 2 hour drive for me. Got all ready to go, set out, made my way there and right when I got to the door good ol Aunt Flo decided to visit. Shark week had struck at the worst possible time, far from home and about to go knock boots with a hot bodybuilder. It was super fun to try to figure out how I was gonna casually bring it up but I have no grace under pressure so I just kinda blurted it out. He was like 40, been married, cool as hell and genuinely didn’t give 2 fucks. Color me shocked but also pleased. We had a grand ol time despite the surprise visitor.
Another time I met a lovely gentleman, also older, and he rocked my world. R.O.C.K.E.D.
So much so that by the time I was in the car, happily driving home I almost dismissed the sudden urge to pee but it was overwhelming. Pulled over at a rest stop, visited the loo and was on my way! Only to have the same horrible sudden urge to pee strike again. Impossible! Of course my brain is thinking ‘spontaneous UTI’ is that even a thing? Idk. All I knew was that I was in pain and still had about an hour drive home. Surely it can’t be a uti within 30 minutes of having sex….and I even showered at his place. It wasn’t, fortunately. Well I found out that day that you can, in fact, be fucked so hard that your urethra kinda collapses a bit and makes it feel like ya gotta pee but with the added bonus of the burning fires of mordor at your cooch. The drive home was so confusing. I was riding high from an incredible time but also in agony and cursing my kitty. Some warm baths and time healed me up in like a day or so but goddamn that was not fun.
Another time a date fractured my nose with my phone trying to take pics/video while we were fucking. Obviously we stopped fucking and I went right home. Looking back at the photos is like a flip book though. In retrospect, very comical and a great set of photos to commemorate my face getting fucked up. At the time though, it sucked. It was days before Christmas and I was bruised and felt shitty. Luckily it was a clean fracture, no medical intervention needed. When I get sick, allergies or whatever it sucks and acts up and I have to mentally find the humor in it because it’s annoying as fuck. So embarrassing at the time. Nobody wants to get an injury while naked and in bed with a lover. 2/10 recommend.
I’ve left the house for a date, many times, in the ‘wrong’ underthings. Ya know how your ‘hair & makeup’ outfit is different from your ‘going out’ outfit? Well I’ve often been running late and thrown my clothes on to get outta the door quickly only to realize I’m not actually wearing the cute bra and panties I picked out but instead I’m wearing the ‘hair and makeup’ bra and undies. Then you get the fun challenge of trying to not make it obvious that you’re just slipping off your own panties and throw them bad boys where they won’t be noticed.
And for a few FYI’s….
Giving head ‘enthusiastically’ can damage soft tissue in your throat. It’s not pleasant.
Your dentist will know a lot about your sex life if you plan dates too close to appointments. Same goes for your Dr and your Gyno will for sure know what’s up. Space out your dates with your Dr and save yourself the embarrassment (if that sort of thing would make you blush).
Now go forth and enjoy your adventures and also enjoy your misadventures!